Healing Emotional Pain by Rewiring the Brain
by Lisa Samet / www.o-books.com
Our lives are filled with enormous beauty, and enormous suffering to! How can we make the journey easier?
The goal of my book, Emotional Repatterning, is to deepen our understanding of the mind – the patterns of thinking and deep-seated beliefs – that keep us feeling stuck and unhappy, so that we can learn to change it: change both our thinking at the conscious level and our beliefs at the subconscious level.
I’ve practiced Naturopathic Medicine as an N.D. for over twenty years. The longer I’ve worked with people, the more I have come to understand that emotional stress and unhappiness are often the basis for physical disease. So, it became important for me to help patients free themselves from what was causing them so much suffering: thinking patterns that were destructive and perpetuated misery, and that were often founded on subconscious beliefs that were hard to change because they were so deeply rooted.
Although, of course, everyone’s stories are different, I began to see certain patterns that were common to all – “the roots” of the unhappiness. I call them “thinking traps” – ways of thinking about and interpreting our lives which make it impossible to find peace and happiness. These patterns are so pervasive that they are almost, we could say, human nature.
But it seems to me that we don’t need to live this way. That awareness and determination to improve our ways of seeing and interpreting our lives could yield very big results – if we had the tools to deeply change the way we see our reality. And in large part, that starts with healing an often broken relationship with our own selves. When we are not well within ourselves, when we don’t love and value ourselves first and foremost, it’s very hard to live a life of ease and gratitude.
When I work with patients, I listen to their stories and I encourage them to take as much responsibility for the dynamics in their relationships as is possible. When patients share a story and tell me that, for example, “…he always makes me feel that way,” we pause right there. No one can make us feel anything. We feel things in reaction to others. But what I feel and how I react is in my domain. That means essentially that I must take responsibility for how I feel and react to any given circumstance. The great news: if I do this, I can change things. If, on the other hand, the other person is responsible for making me feel a certain way – I am stuck. No change is possible, as I can’t change anyone else.
So, if I want change, I must take as much responsibility for as much as I can in my life – so that I can change things for the better This is very empowering, and not the way most of us do it. Most of us function by blaming others for our problems, the very opposite of being responsible for as much of a dynamic as I can be. We don’t take responsibility in the spirit of blaming ourselves, not at all. We always have compassion for ourselves- that is part of self love. We take responsibility so that we can effect more change.
Now, that is empowering.
I have really come to believe that Earth is a school. That we come here to learn and then we go back home after our education is complete, or at least has advanced to the next level. If we have come here to learn, why aren’t we more open to it? Why are we often so defensive, making everyone else wrong? If we knew for a fact that we were only here temporarily to learn and evolve before returning home, would we approach life differently? Be more open? Take more risks?
When we are challenged, when we hit difficult times, when we are stretched beyond our limits, we often become wiser. And this is how we evolve. Six years ago when my youngest was 10, he was diagnosed with leukemia. We went through a grueling two plus years of treatment, 154 days of chemo treatments to be exact. The pain and suffering that little guy went through are even to this day very difficult for me to think about. The protective bubble that I thought we had built around our family by raising our kids with the best foods and natural medicine, was shattered.
Ben fought hard and lived - and is now 16 years old. But the suffering I lived through as his mom broke me wide open. And our family was forever changed in big and small ways. Through my sadness and fear I began to understand suffering in a different way, and was left with something which I will call a gift of insight. I was better able to understand the nature of life and suffering with a clarity that I still find hard to explain. I now have a certain intuitive knowledge when working with patients; I feel their blocks and stuck areas as if they were my own.
As is often the case with deep suffering, the resulting personal learning was enormous. I would never in a million years have chosen it, but we don’t always get a say. I was determined to be fully present and learn whatever I could about myself going through it. If this really is a school, I told myself I was in a PhD program, in something like astrophysics! But I was determined to be up to the task.
In those years and since, I learned how to work with the subconscious mind, about how old beliefs about the world and ourselves get stuck there, often from childhood, and keep us in patterns that perpetuate our unhappiness. I studied at least five different methods and combined with my clinical experience, developed my own amalgamation of them which is simple to learn and well-described in my book. It involves better understanding the subconscious minds and our deep beliefs, then putting ourselves in a position that integrates the right and left brain to facilitate new learning, and then teaching ourselves a new belief, a better belief.
The changes I have seen in myself over the years, and the feedback my patients have given me about the profound shifts they see in themselves and how they respond to others, is nothing short of amazing. Although I do like talk therapy because it allows one to deeply explore and understand all the issues, where we’ve been and how we’ve gotten here - this method is focused on rapid change. The difference is, with talk therapy and so many other types of therapy, we are understanding and processing with our conscious mind, whereas with Emotional Repatterning we are focusing on upgrading the software, if you will, in the subconscious mind - the deep processing area and repository of old beliefs and patterns. This leads to a deep shift in our perceptions, and then change is automatic.
Emotional Repatterning is available from www.o-books.com and from wherever books are sold.
Read Emotional Repatterning Today!
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